A Sleepless Night
There was something not quite right about the window. It was lifted about a quarter of an inch but only on one corner. It was as if a tiny, yet herculean, mouse lifted it up to come in from the rain.
No, not a mouse. I hate mice. They’re tiny and fast and diseased. Don’t let it be a mouse! A mouse could run up the leg of my jeans while I lounge on the couch with a book. He could be a sprinter up Mt. Everest. They can do that. They can run up your pant leg so fast that you don’t even realize what’s happening until they bite your thigh and spread the Bubonic Plague.
Ok. I have to stop being silly. They can treat the Bubonic Plague, now. It isn’t a death sentence like it was in the Middle Ages. Back then they didn’t know how to treat anything. They’d just slap a leech on you and hope for the best. They don’t do things like that anymore. They… What do they do? How do they treat the Plague, now? Maybe I should Google it.
Yeah, that’s smart. Sit at the computer. A mouse wouldn’t bother you at the computer, would it? No, I mean, after all, it’s not like it would be offended that you are using a MOUSE to maneuver your way around the screen. Do mice get offended? I’m almost sure they don’t.
Almost. Is there really room for “almost” when dealing with a mouse strong enough to lift even the corner of the window?
What if I sat down to read, and I read the Bible? That mouse wouldn’t dare to bite me while I read the Bible, would it? Yeah, that’s a good idea. Read the Bible. Read Revelation. That’s far more frightening than a mouse. It’s even more frightening than the Plague.
Really? Am i going to use the Bible as a talisman? I know it says something about Bible reading being good to ward off Satan, but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t say anything about warding off mice…unless it’s Satan in the form of a mouse…
Great. Now I don’t just have to worry about a muscular mouse; I have to worry about a mouse that is mighty and Satan incarnate. No worries there. I’ll just read my Bible.
What good is that going to do? It won’t keep me from getting the Plague. Maybe, I could hit the mouse with the Bible! No, I’m not sure that’s okay. I do know I’d rather have the Plague than have God angry with me.
Maybe that’s it. Maybe that’s why the mouse came into my home. Maybe God is mad at me. No, God’s not going to send a mouse to give me the Plague just because he’s mad at me. God wouldn’t do that, would He? I don’t remember what they say about that in church.
I think I have a solution! I’ll keep my socks and shoes on and tuck my pant legs into my socks! Yes, I think that might work. It MIGHT work. Is that good enough? Maybe that will give me a little peace while I Google treatments for the Plague. For that matter, I think I will Google whether or not God still sends plagues on people who anger Him.
I’ll just tuck my pant legs in my socks and pray for the best.
I’ll just go about my day like that. Who cares if I look silly? There’s no one here to see. If someone comes over, I’ll just explain it, and they will understand. They would understand, wouldn’t they? Anyone would.
I’ll just walk around like that tonight, and in the morning I can call the exterminator. That’s a great idea! When I wake up, I’ll call the exterminator. Wake up? That means I would have to sleep. I would have to sleep with a Satanic Hercules of a mouse running around while I sleep… while i’m not awake to know when or where it will bite me with it’s needle teeth, infecting me with a virus that could kill me before I wake!
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